I wish there was someone out there, who could understand my life. Anyone else at all, who could feel the way I do.
I hate being me. Alone in all my thoughts. Special and uniqueness have imprisoned me with their curse. This long-standing pattern of grandiosity for which I dwell. It can really bring me down.
What I would not give for just another equal soul. Jesus must have felt as me. Only he was fooled by his trust in friends and betrayed by his father’s love. I would never be as foolish.
No one loves as deep as me. That’s why I will never fall in love. Sure I can give the illusion of happiness and bliss. But it’s all just a facade to a never-ending fable. My pain is too great for an average man to endure. I am destined for greatness, for great is what I am. I am a leader and a ruler, I will rise above them all.
I wish only an end to all those who do not love me. Their death although so meaningless, would insure a surge within my power. If you are not with me then your against me. If you’re not mine than you are nothing. I will make you love me. I will look into your eyes. My lies will become the truth for they have passed beyond my lips. A soft caress and little kiss and you will be mine forever. In my illusions of grandeur you will be my audience in the front row to insanity.
This life of mine is never easy. My every day life of a biopsychosocial model of causation. My footsteps become a letter in the greatest of all stories. I was not created in the image of God, but created as a God. Pawns will come and go, but the King will remain until the game comes to an end.
I will make you believe in me. For I am charming and good-looking. I’ll make you believe my desire is for you. But my appetite for sex is a hunger that can’t be filled. I only want to use you to strengthen my ability and to stimulate my ego. Your body I will use to quench a never-ending thirst. I will tell you that I love you, when love does not exists. I will never trust you, for you are weak in your emotion. Your shame and your guilt and your remorse are the things I despise the most. I am incapable of loving a lessor form of being. One with such compassion for the humanity of life.
I demand all of your attention. I will not go unnoticed. I am the most interesting and charismatic person in the room. My invention of experience will mesmerize you all. For I have seen the things most men will never come to see. I have lived a life that only I could live. Exaggerated content added to all that I have done. I have lived a thousand lives, and have crushed a thousand more. I see you only as a step for my rise to fame and fortune.
I am a master of my words in a running stream of consciousness. You will hang upon my every word. And believe it all so well. And even as your bending over, holding to your knees, you will thank me as I do whatever as I please. For I am the one they call the word. I am a golden God in this world filled with filth. I am a savior for the lonely and a condemner of the souls who’ve lost their way.
Tears are for the weak. For the stupid and afraid. What kind of man cries when watching a movie about stars that have their faults. Those controlled by emotion, not the powerful and the strong.
I am spontaneous and intense. Not bound by social contracts. The ropes that tie the hands with sorrow and malcontent. I am a master of influence, and a teacher of deception. I am the liar. I am the truth. I am not you, for I will always stand alone.
I am the Narcissist.
I am the Sociopath.
I am the Narcissistic Sociopath.
Follow me or die.